Preschool and so forth
Had a talk with Zoë's teacher today. She suggested that we might want to put Zoë in the three-year-old class again next year, as she may not be ready for the four-year-old classes. Apparently, they're a lot more structured. I said we'd wait and see how Zoë's doing, but I think it's probably good advice. This teacher has always given good advice, and I do trust her professional opinion.
Andrew already suggested that we might wait a year before enrolling Zoë in school. I was hesitant about that, but now I'm thinking maybe it's a good idea. The extra year would give Zoë time to catch up somewhat, and she's very little (she's always been on the second percentile for height and weight), so it's not like she'd stand out especially (unless she takes after her Uncle Greg, who was always the smallest kid until he suddenly shot up to six feet and a few inches some time around the beginning of high school, but I kinda doubt Zoë will do that).
It would be kinda weird having your sister in the year behind you when you're two years apart in age, but I think they'd get used to that. Kids get used to far worse or much weirder circumstances.
Zoë is showing great improvement, of course. She's gotten much, much more cooperative and understands the school routines much better now, and of course she's communicating much more (I'm not the only one who has noticed her greatly improved eye contact, for example). So we'll see. But if she ends up starting school a year later, I think that will be all right, and probably best for her in the long run.
Sick girls
Zoë's been sick, poor kid. She developed a fever on Friday, and she seemed to feel better Saturday morning, but by Saturday night, she was sobbing and saying, "Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no!" over and over again as if she was in pain, despite the dose of pain reliever. I suspected perhaps he had an ear infection, so we went looking for a doctor that was open. Never did find one, but we got in contact with a doctor's office and they recommended we take her to the hospital, so that's what we did (and that's what we had been trying to avoid because of the long waits, etc.).
They wanted to get a urine sample to rule out an infection, but we had no luck getting one, and as she seemed to perk up and it was getting late, they sent us home with a followup appointment for Sunday morning. Poor kid eventually had to get a catheter in order to get a urine sample, because she just wouldn't go (which indicates to me that she is, actually, capable of holding it, but that's another topic entirely).
No sign of any obvious infections, and she's slowly been getting better by herself. Fever's been gone for a while, although she's been pretty irritable and tired. Last night, she developed a bit of a cough that sounds something like post nasal drip.
And yet, in the midst of all this, her communication is getting better. She's been saying "I love you," and "I love you, too," lately, and "toast" and she formed two sentences on her own, spontaneously. She said, "I good," and also, "I cute." I don't think she knows what "cute" actually means, but she knows it's something good.
In other areas, we've ordered the complete set of language development CDs (and DVDs) from Baby BumbleBee. I've heard really good things about this program in a speech delay forum I sometimes visit, and Zoë's extremely responsive to music and visual displays, so we thought this would be a good idea. The shipping is a bit pricey, but in the long run, I think it'll be worth it, based on the glowing reviews I've heard from at least one speech therapist and from parents of speech delayed children.
More on that as it develops.
Communication
Well, Zoë's not really talking any great deal more, but she seems to be understanding a lot better, and that's actually a big help. When she understands a simple command like, "Wait," or "Let me help," it makes life so much more pleasant for everyone.
She did come out with a rather cute new phrase yesterday, though. We were having a cuddle and I was saying all the things I always say to her, things like, "I love you," "I'm so glad you're my little girl," etc. She was clearly enjoying it, giving me hugs and kisses, etc., and then she said, "I so cute."
She was prompting me to tell her she was cute. Heheh. She's said it a few more times now, as well. I say, "You're so cute," and she grins and says, "I so cute."
Tonight she was saying, "Zoë good girl," over and over. Earlier she had been scolded, and I think she was trying to tell us she was good or get us to tell her.
She has been caught lately deliberately knocking Miranda down. It's not a hard push or a hit or anything. Zoë just raises her arm across the baby's chest and pushes her off balance, or pushes the backs of her knees so she plops down. Miranda hasn't complained and I don't think it's mean spirited, but it's not really appropriate. Every time I catch Zoë doing it, she gets scolded for it (which, of course, she doesn't like). Perhaps this is why she was trying to convince us she's a good girl...
Counting!
Zoë is counting! She's been able to count to ten for a long time now, but I didn't know if she actually understood what she was doing, or if she was just reciting.
Well, just now she had a little toy and she was throwing it over her shoulder and counting each time she did it. She'd toss the thing, hear it land, and count, then do it again. Even when she accidentally threw it into the playcot and had to climb in to retrieve it, she remembered her place and continued when she got it and tossed it onto the floor!
Wow, I'm actually kind of stunned at the moment...
Conversation
Zoë has reached a point where I think she's had a breakthrough.
Earlier today she didn't want to eat her lunch, and because she was hungry, she was being beastly. To make a long story short, I ended up putting her in her bed because I thought she might be tired, as well (thinking she'd be more willing to eat when she got up). However, Ms. Zoë had other ideas, and got out of bed and stood by the door (which she can't open by herself) sobbing and occasionally pouding on it.
I described the situation to Andrew and said, "I wish you were here. I think this may call for a change of parent." He suggested he could call her. I thought that was probably a good idea. I went and got Zoë and gave her a cuddle and wiped her nose and face and then had Andrew call.
Zoë not only recognized his voice, she actually had a conversation with him. She listened while he talked, and responded to what he said. She was telling him all about it. I didn't understand all of what she said (nor did he), but the gist of it was that she was telling him she was upset and why, and he suggested she have a drink and something to eat and calm down, after he asked if she was all right (to which she responded, "Zoë you all right," her usual phrase to calm herself). Then I suggested she say goodbye and she did, and we ended the call.
Somewhat surpisingly (for me, anyway), it worked beautifully. She went off to watch the movie I'd put on (which she had earlier refused to watch and cried about when I put it on) and then she decided she'd eat a cracker or two and have a drink of the juice still in her cup on the table. Now she's quite calmed down and seems to have gotten over whatever snit she was in earlier.
The thing here, though, is that she not only knew she was talking to her father, she was actually talking to her father, and having a rudimentary conversation. This is the first time I've seen this kind of interplay, although she does frequently respond to some questions, etc. This was a short but sustained interactive conversation. Real communication.
Mind you, she still has only a 30+ word/phrase vocabulary and she still misunderstands an awful lot of what we say to her (a simple, "Bring me your cup," earlier reduced her to tears), but the sparks are finally starting to leap across those synaptic barriers in her slightly mis-wired little brain.
This is good.
Assements and so forth
Well, Zoë's visit to the pediatric specialist was Friday. Basically, we need to do the blood test again because they didn't get the result they needed (although they still billed us several hundred dollars, most of which is covered by Medicare, thankfully). Her iron levels were "borderline", although she's not anemic.
The diagnosis for the time being is that she's developmentally delayed (probably Pervasive Developmental Delay if you had to put a specific name on it), but that's all. We're going to try supplementing her iron for two months, get the blood tests done again, and then go back to the doctor to see if there's been improvement. Apparently, iron deficiency can cause all kinds of problems.
Zoë's EEG was normal, no sign of seizure activity. So we need to rule out the Fragile X Syndrome (which is what the blood tests were for and which I sincerely doubt she has, given the descriptions of Fragile X that I've read) and have her hearing tested again to confirm (again, we're positive she can hear) and just wait and see.
There seems to be a lot of that with developmental delays, actually...
She is doing well at school and in other ways, though. I haven't heard any new words or phrases lately, but she's about tripled her word/phrase count in the past three months or so. She's also communicating better in general. One of the mothers at pre-school told me Zoë made good eye contact and asked for help (non-verbally) when the mum was helping out there, so that's a very good thing.
Zoë is also very much enjoying doing jigsaw puzzles. We got a few for her last week and she's been having a good time with them. One of them is a bit advanced for her and she can't work it by herself (yet), but with a little bit of help she can do it. Puzzles are good because they keep her occupied quietly for a fair chunk of time, and that's always a good thing.
Things are about the same on the potty training front. She's not particularly interested in going to the toilet. She'll make the effort if we put her on the potty, but that's about it. She won't say when she needs to go, she doesn't seem to care if she gets praise or a treat for going on the potty, she doesn't care if she poos in her pants. And that's just bowel training. We haven't even begun to approach bladder training yet...
Toilet training was one of the things we discussed at Iribina, and this sort of thing is very, very common in developmentally delayed children. There are ways to get them to use the toilet, but at this point I don't think we've got much going for us in that department. I guess we'll just keep going as we have been for a while and hope she comes to a developmental point where she finally starts to understand.
Other than the potty and the ongoing speech difficulties, though, Zoë is, in fact, doing well. Her tantrums are much improved and she's much, much more cooperative with most things these days. She's quite pleasant to have around, and just as charming an eccentric as ever.
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